Apocalypse Now

In recent hours, days, months, I've been having the most horrific and detailed end-of-the-world dreams. I don't like this very much at all, yet it continues night after night. How do I stop this? I try to think of sugar plums (which sound disgusting, though they look pretty delicious in this here picture to the right - and by delicious I mean if you're a carnivore and love eating raw meat - YUM!) and fairies, but it doesn't really work. And I no longer take the Advil PM, so I think the stomach bleeding has subsided, for now.

Anyway, I was thinking about these dreams last night... before I went to bed (I know, I know! But I didn't have one last night), and how I could translate them into my writing. My last undergraduate full-length was this semi-abstract post-apocalyptic allegory on US foreign policies and global climate control, called "The Sandstorm" ooooooooh!

Most of these dreams give me time to know that I am going to die. It's not quick. There's warning. There's panic followed by a strange calmness, an acceptance of one's fate. It's something everyone, all over, is doing together. There's no escaping. What a way to show humanity we're all in this together. In the dreams the TV reporters stop reporting with 5-12 hours left, to be with their loved ones, and for those lonely people out there, if they choose to stay indoors rather than watch the spectacular sun approaching, there is a looping tape playing on all channels of loved ones greeting each other at the airport (like in "Love Actually").

I was thinking about that above scene last night, and how I could work it into its own piece, but then I remembered that I've already seen it. There was this 10 minute play, "The Kiss", I saw last summer at a Chicago Dramatists play festival. The sun was engulfing the earth, I think, but I remember everything was growing really dark... so maybe it was the moon colliding. Anyway, there is the guy and a girl (who didn't know each other before this moment) who both escaped the craziness of the city to watch from atop a car in this junkyard on the edge of society. They discuss the lives they've lead and how it might feel to die this way, and (here comes the title) the guy says he imagines it will be like a kiss, perhaps a goodnight one.

So I'd have to do it differently than that.

Also, I love the "Twilight Zone" and there's this really crazy episode where this same thing happens... kind of. There's this woman living in an apartment in NYC and the heat keeps going up, up, up as the sun gets closer, closer, closer. People are fainting and dying, and it's bad news bears. Then, the thermometer breaks and you think it's all over for everyone. No. They do those dream waves and you see that this woman is lying in bed, dressed for a fever, which just broke (explaining the thermometer). She comes to and tells her dream to her caretaker. Oh yes, how scary, indeed. Then the caretaker tells her to sleep, sleep and she does. The caretaker walks over to someone else in the room and mentions something about how the poor, stupid girl doesn't even know, but the exact opposite is true. The sun is moving away, away, away and it's getting cold, cold, cold. Like the end of the Dinosaurs, the show, not the real things. They're still around. Duh! Jurassic Park!
I found the above when searching for the "Twilight Zone" - very bizarre. I think the latter part of #1 can be explained when you mention the housewife was on acid and a combination of other drugs she acquired from Amy Winehouse. The same can be said for #2, or Iran's missile testing. #3, a LION! How about a Cougar?! That happened here! Let's say people in Leicester like to watch a lot of movies... maybe Arachnophobia and Lake Placid - yeah. CRABS falling from the sky? That sounds like a mean prank Richard Branson would play... and also a bunch of hooey! I should look and see if this came from the National Enquirer. Just thought I would share the head-scratching goodness with you.

Adieu.

Milk and Cookies Inspiration

So, I should be doing other things... such as sleeping, maybe, but I'm not really tired, mostly bored. I shall write instead, and then perhaps do some reading, in bed.

But first, I want to expand on my series of crazy dreams that occurred in the post midnight hours between the days of May 8th and 9th, 2008.

First dream, of four. I was in a park, perhaps Lincoln Park, over by the geese pond, gazing into the water, searching for lost thoughts - let's say. And I guess there's some playwriting contest festival-y thing going on that day. The theme behind the contest is writing a play that is concept driven rather than focusing on characters. Maybe something to do with an epiphany? [Mind you I wrote these notes after the last 3 of 4 dreams, and the first dream had many things that slipped away before my pen hit the page, kind of like Jerry writing out the world's best joke but it turned out to be undecipherable scribbles the next morning] Then, there was a beautiful boy there, and he fell in love with me, but too fast. He was making too many plans, so many that I couldn't keep up. Then his father was there, as we were walking across a bridge. His father was only in town for a night, and they were going to dinner. The boy invited me along, but I said no, that was ridiculous, I don't know you. The father told the son not to rush things, and handed me his business card. I don't remember what was on it, it's not important, or is it? Was it blank? I don't know. A bird shat on me, as we were crossing the bridge. I was disturbed, especially when the boy wiped it off without thinking. Really? Okay... There was some really witty dialogue, so witty in fact that I remembered it when I first awoke and was so proud and impressed with myself for having dreamt it, but then, alas I thought I would remember it. I repeated it to myself and I told myself to remember it. Yeah, let's just say that didn't really work.

Dream 2, of 4 - I wasn't participating, but watching the events unfold, helpless to the outcome. There was a family; husband, wife, 2 small daughters. This family was very important. They were trying to cross borders, a very dangerous thing to do. There was a succession of checkpoints. They had been briefed on the fact that there should be 2 guards at every post, each post was an ancient stucco archway, beautifully ornate. With hurried walks and darting eyes, they passed through the first three, no problem. Then, at the fourth, and final checkpoint, there was only one guard. It was useless to turn back after coming that far, the father thought they must press on, for what was their other option? Before they had time to consider alternatives, a man wielding a machine gun shot them all to the ground. As the family lay bloodied and dying, a thief robbed them of all their precious possessions. The littlest daughter cried out, using the last of her strength, "Why father!? Why!!" as the father lay choking on his blood. Off to the side of the archway I saw a cloaked woman with bright blue Tammy Faye-esque eyes.

Dream 3, of 4. This one was a bit weirder, and harder to explain because the scenes changed so rapidly and it was obscenely abstract. I'm standing in what I believe is "my" garage. It's the middle of the night, I'm with Smash McDash, and the police are there. There was an incident of drunk driving, on Smash's part. Apparently she crashed my family's gold mini-van (which we haven't owned for 10 years, classy mid-to-late 90s) and then perfectly parked it in the garage. Then, I guess she went out again and the cops pulled her over for weaving on her bicycle. She was able to get away because Paris Hilton outside, sitting in an empty bathtub, on a roof, with the curtain drawn. What? There was something about Dr. Pepper cans littered everywhere in the car, but really they reeked of booze. The cops caught Smash again, and she blamed everything on Dena. There was more to that dream, the places we had been, but they, too, floated away into the gray space of my subconscious.

Last of the 4. After witnessing the checkpoint massacre, I was walking past a fated flight - I knew this because the same Tammy Faye eyes lady was serving as the head flight attendant, so you know it isn't going to turn out good for anybody. As I'm walking through a parking lot, a flock of seagulls flies out of my shirt. Feathers and quills are everywhere, stuck in my shirt, teeth, and hair. I pull them out frantically, worrying about the diseases they carry... Not worrying about the fact that I have sea-faring birds flying out of me, but what strain of avian flu I might catch. Possibly a valid worry.

So, lesson learned. No more milk and cookies before bedtime. It's no wonder Santa Claus thinks his "reindeer" can fly, he's a crazy dreamer, too.

WAIT! One more thing!

I totally forgot this, until 48 seconds ago!! I had another apocalyptic dream last night, and I was convinced that I was going to wake up to a smoldering Earth. A lot of it's hazy, but I remember a "Dante's Peak"-esque scene where the road was turning into a fiery inferno and there was a bus full of screaming children that I ran past. I was trying to get to my family, and I had some friends that were going to the top of a ski resort to get drunk - the altitude makes it fast and cheap - and they were razzing me about wasting my last moments being scared in the loving arms of my loved ones. Oooh. I didn't like that. Then, upon waking up, for the first moments, such as when I was on the phone with the job hunter, I was thinking that I only had 4 years to live life to its fullest potential. Yeah. Whoa. 4 years, why 4?! Well, duh. Everyone knows that 2012 is the year of death for all, December 21... very scary. I don't actually believe it, when I'm not dreaming... why must people always predict doom. Y'know Nostradamus was drunk when he wrote his prophecies and was probably thinking, what can really scare people in the future? Oh, I know, I'll give them a specific year in which the world will end. That'll be crazy for them, and I'll be really vague so my "prophecies" can be put into any context, and people will believe every word I write!!! AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!


Okay, real quick, and then I really need to go. I totally feel like Marsha Brady right now, doing this whole match.dom thing, and talking to lotsa guys all at the same time. Apparently, I'm a great phone conversationalist, not awkward at all. So that's good to know. Okay. I need to put on clothes and leave my home - I've been blogging without pants this whole time. Too much information for you? I'm so sorry. Deal with it, baby!